Classics

*Warning: This post is about books.*

One of the goals I've been planning to accomplish before I die is to finish reading War and Peace by Leo Tolstoy. Because I've heard it's a majorly boring book translated from Russian and it's like askfjoiufakjd long. Dear readers, I have just told you a very important fact about myself. Cherish it.

So when I found out from The Last Song that Leo Tolstoy has actually written a book that isn't askrjoeuixjcfasdf long, I resolved to buy it and give it a try. To prepare myself before my big task of reading War and Peace. I have no idea what Anna Karenina is about, btw. When my mom asked me about it as we were buying it, all I could say was that it was about a rich and beautiful Russian high-society lady who ditches her husband for a wealthy army officer, and presumably dies at the end. :)

Ah, classics. Every once in a while I force myself to buy a classic and read it through to the end, and in this instance, it's Anna Karenina. I don't even know why I do this. The last classic I read was Wuthering Heights, and that book was just so despicably horrible that I'm sure I have mental and emotional scars from reading it, just like when I forced myself to read The Lord of the Flies. Those are the really horribly sick classics. Then there are those that just make you fall asleep every time you turn a page, and if I wanted to tackle one of those, I'd just go to my big fat Shakespeare book and try to read through a drama.

Hanging around the classics section so much lately, I realise there are so-o many classics I haven't read yet. Sigh.

And it's all very well that I've got books to read, but the fact remains that I have been waiting for more than a year and a half for Beka Cooper: Bloodhound to come out in paperback. Now I'm living in fear that it will remain in hardcover forever. And no way are my parents going to buy it for me at sixty bucks. :( I need this book. It's supposed to be the twenty-third book in my Tamora Pierce collection.

What if you slept...

I saw this poem being flashed at the beginning of some movie on Astro, goodness knows I can't remember, it was months, maybe a year ago. But I've remembered it until now, and I've finally googled it, and here it is.

What if you slept
And what if
In your sleep
You dreamed
And what if
In your dream
You went to heaven
And there plucked a strange and beautiful flower
And what if
When you awoke
You had that flower in you hand
Ah, what then? 

- Samuel Taylor Coleridge

It's a very short and funny, and I don't know why I remember it at all. But it's a dear little poem, don't you think? When I saw the "Ah, what then?" on the screen I just got the chills. 'cause I'm cool like that.

Sigh. I always loved those old fairytales about the flowers on the moon I read as a child.

Gosh I sound old. Do you know, thinking that you're all grown up is the most obvious indicator that you're a still a child, really? I don't mind. I'll think I'm all grown up if it means I can still be a child.

No, actually, I don't really want to be a child anymore.

Yes, I'm in one of those whimsical moods of mine.

Of Graceling & Excitement

It's a beautiful world and all of you people are beautiful because you are in it. I'm going to tell you now, how much you friends are beautiful to me. :)


Sent this text to a bunch of friends just now.

Thirty seconds later: Chalystha calling.

Are you okay?
Yes...
Are you on drugs?
Noo...
Are you high?

Noo...

Did a hot guy like ask you out?

Noo...

Did a hot guy smile at you?

Noo...

*pause*
Did a you buy a new book?

Lol, that sister, she knows me too well.

Flashback: Now, a different phone call, about two hours before I sent the text and Cha called.

I pick up the phone tremulously.

"Hello?" I say, my heart beating so hard I can feel it in my ears.

"Hello is this Miss Jacie Tan... this is MPH Bookstore calling..."

I lost track of the Malay dude's voice for a while. In that instant, I am soaring high above the clouds, tripping over the moon.

"...regarding the book Graceling..."

"Yes?"

I wonder if this angel on the phone can hear the many layers of bliss beneath the carefully controlled tone of my voice.

"....and it has been confirmed that this book has arrived under your name..."

"YES..."

"....so, when will you be by to pick it up?"

I wrench my handphone from my ear and go flying off all the way to my mom.

"MOMMY! IT'S HERE! GRACELING'S HERE! IT'S MINE!"

"It is, is it?"

It's amazing how unfeeling some people can be. My mom was unfazed.

"YES. He wants to know when we can pick it up."

"Fine lo."

"What do you mean, FINE? We can go tonight?"

"Yeah la."

I turn joyfully back to the guy waiting patiently on the phone, and this time I can't contain my glee.

"Tonight! Tonight. I'll come pick it up tonight."

"...okay you come pick it up at the customer service counter ma'am..."

"OKAY. OKAY. OHMIGOD. THANK YOUUUUU!"

Suddenly, something changed. The voice on the phone is no longer one of a  bored, can-I-go-buka-puasa-now kind of guy. He says, "You're welcome, Jacie," and I can hear the smile in his voice.

The world is a beautiful place, indeed.

So I went to MPH in MidV, walked into the customer service and said, with all the dignity proper of my sixteen years, "Hello, I'm here to pick up a book I ordered... Graceling." At which the Malay guy there immediately smiles and goes, "Miss Jacie."

One of those moments when you wish the ground would open up and swallow you whole.

He remembered my name. Because, as my mom said, a little sadly and patronisingly, I screamed like a wild jackass on the phone.

I need to learn how to act my age.

Mommy's locking Graceling up tonight. She and daddy say it's bad to stay all night up reading. Ah well. If you look at the post just before this one, I suppose it's good to let parents exercise their parental authority once in a while.

The Last Song (The Book)

Bought it last night. Then proceeded to stay up to 3a.m. reading it. Yeah, my book addiction is getting worse. It sucks at me, pulling at me, despite all the numerous times I tried to go to sleep. But partly to do with my grandmother too la. Anyway, went to school with my nose buried in it - haven't done that in ages, walking around Samad while reading. I didn't fall into a longkang, walk into a tiang or tumble down the stairs though, so it's nice to know I've still got the touch. Finished the book about twenty minutes after first period Sivik started, and cried in class. This combined with the fact that my eyes were dry from lack of sleep made my contact bunch up and fold inside my right eye. It is as painful as it sounds, btw.

The book is good. Different from the movie, darker, definitely, and it's hard to believe that both screenplay and novel were written by Nicholas Sparks. No regrets buying it, despite the fact my mother made me pay for it myself.

The Last Song (The Movie)

YES, I KNOW, IT'S MILEY CYRUS. DON'T HAVE A HEART ATTACK AND DIE.

I finally downloaded the movie and watched it, after meaning to for very long. It was the minute I read the description I think, something about Nicholas Sparks' revving up his old "A Walk to Remember" magic, that I resolved, no matter what, that I would both watch and read The Last Song. The only question was which to do first. Because, I love A Walk To Remember! It's right up there next to Lord of the Rings and Pride & Prejudice. I've watched AWTR at least nine times, no joke, and can still cry even after all those re-watches. If this was to be like AWTR in any way, I would rather sit next to erm... Calvin than miss out on it.

Now, for the movie. It was as good as AWTR, in many ways better. It's about musical prodigy Veronica "Ronnie" Miller, who turned rebel after her parents divorced and musically-inclined father left. Usually, bratty, rebellious, I-totally-hate-my-parents-because-they-ruined-my-life stories just irritate me no end. But, I think this one was different. The movie wasn't just focused on the love story between Ronnie and Will, and that was good. The turtles and younger brother Jonah were great side-features, and so was the Blaze-Ronnie thing. Plus, I like Ronnie herself. Despite the teenage rebellion, and I like how that's portrayed in the movie. She's different, and still has her morals, and loves her younger brother. I like how Will cracked through her armour, but I also like how she was still herself, not like those girls who typically change after they meet prince charming.

Oh, and Will. I swear, thank God Liam Hemsworth has an ugly mouth. I mean, if he didn't, he'd be utterly incredibly drool-worthily gorgeous, and that added to the fact that he's the perfect boyfriend, a romantic, funny, rich, sweet, caring, loving and always takes care of Ronnie no matter how tiring she is, would just probably have me watching the movie as many times as I could fit into a day. Argh, I love their relationship la. It's so sweet that he's hunky enough to just pick her up and carry her as easily as if she were a doll.

Like this.

But I did give it a second viewing the very day after I watched it the first time with my mom and sister. That's because when I first watched it, I was crying half the movie (of course), and it's hard to peer at the screen with torrents of tears running down your face and practically blinding you. In addition to that, when I could control the volume of my sobs, I'd hear my mom sniffling instead. (I had to get it from somewhere, though I'm like ten times worse than her.)

Well, it wasn't a mind-blowing, award-winning movie, but it's sweet and nice and I, the hopeless romantic, like it. :) Worth suffering a whole day of painfully swollen eyes in school for. Miley Cyrus was okay for me, besides, Liam Hemsworth is her real-life boyfriend so you can tell the on-screen chemistry was real. Nicholas Sparks wrote the screenplay (he did an awesome job!) of this movie, then wrote the book, so I guess I got the order right. Going to buy the book tonight. =D

Miley Cyrus' "I Look At You" is to kill for.

Daddy

It kinda sucks, that it's on Sundays when I think thoughts un-Christian I hardly ever think on other days?

I admit, I was upset.

But, my daddy made me feel all better.

I didn't know if he fixed it or made it worse, but it doesn't matter.

Daddy loves me.

Taylor Swift - The Best Day

Inception - why I'm giving it a poor review

"Taking someone's mind and changing it is a trespass. A violence."

-Kristin Cashore, in Fire

*Added a bit at the bottom

I went to go watch this movie with my boy Gan Yi Quan, as was originally promised, after a very long wait. Major spoilers whitened out. For those who would rather die than read all of this, go to the summary in red at the end.

Okay, we all know Inception was awesome. Very, very good mind-bending movie. And the main question of it all! Really, it's great that there's a movie so complex you need to keep your mind strained to make sure you keep up with it all.

But there are a lot of websites out there commenting on that part of it, so I'm going to step away from this sci-fi, mind-scrambling part of it, the theories and what-ifs, and move on to the other aspects I look for in movies. Please don't kill me, Inception fans - keep reading, if your blood pressure allows!

Morally, this movie was not sound. To me, la. I mean, isn't stealing people's ideas a violation of a human's right? It's a violation, a gross violation, to steal someone's privacy like that. Of course, this movie wouldn't exist if Dom and his team weren't thought-snatchers, but it doesn't even give out a hint that it's wrong, just plain wrong, to do such a horrible thing. There are movies, like Ocean's, who are thieves, but there are carefully scripted lines that show that they aren't happy with what they're doing, and they do it honourably, and give back money where necessary. Like in Leverage, or A-Team - honourable thieves. Doing it for a reason. Whereas I feel Dom & Co is just plain old mercenary. They just steal ideas blindly for this corporation, not caring about the impact it has on the world - that could be as bad as helping to build mass-destruction weapons.

Emotionally, I didn't feel any tie in between the members, either. It was horrible, the way Dom just plunged his team into the three-layered dream, without bothering to tell them of the heightened stakes. And he refused to take the blame - instead, he made a big deal of Arthur not doing his job properly. Okay, Arthur made a slip - DOM just totally played his entire team. The whole time I was on the edge of my seat for Saito, and thinking daggers at Dom. It's not just Dom, either - the chemist knew, but he shut up, because of the money. Mercenary once again!

And this time it could be just wholly me, but I think Leonardo diCaprio didn't carry his acting off well. I blame it solely on him that I feel nothing in the sense of the Dom-Mal relationship. Nothing! I didn't even cry! The tears came, but they did not flow! Now, that is seriously a defect. This movie failed to make me cry. And am I the only one who finds Mal's continuous popping up everywhere annoying? She's just a bloody projection, because according to Arthur she was lovely in real life, but she keeps ruining everything. And it's all Dom's fault. Someone oughtta sucker-punch that guy in the face. He has to stop getting everyone on his team killed, just because a figment of his brain keeps coming out of nowhere and sticking knives into people.

Mal's nuts, btw, and since Mal's all in Dom's head, Dom's nuts.

The part when they showed all those people sharing a dream, because it was the only way they could dream, just chilled me to the bone. That was addiction, pure addiction - the whole practice of sharing dreams had become a drug to them. It was the same with Ariadne - she came back, because she'd had a taste, and everything else was flat for her. She's so young - I can bet you she's ruined for normal real-life architecture after this. She'll end up like Mal, mark my words. Dom was guilty, but for the wrong reason, in my opinion. How could you expect your wife to just leave a life where she has everything, and come crashing back down to reality? When you live in an alternate life for years? It's like Philip Pullman's theory - you can't live in any life but your own. Doesn't anyone feel that both Mal and Dom wrote their own doom the minute they decided to play God and live a false-life for goodness knows how long?

Usually I'm all for the father yearning to return to his kids. But in this case, I just felt... emotionally detached.

And the movie is a very well-made one, but there are the how-could-they-have-missed-that's. Like, okay, I don't get it, if you wake up from a dream, and then see ALL those people who've been in the dream with you sitting in the SAME plane with you, don't you smell something fishy? If you've been trained to expect that people can pick your brains and all that? Plus, Arthur's bomb-rigging would've taken much more than a few minutes, a thought of mine also shared by the IMDB people.

Coming back to the HUGE Inception question, *highlight if you want to read major spoiler*

Whether or not the WHOLE movie is a dream because the top never did stop spinning, it doesn't make much of a difference to me. Like I said to Hui Jan, this question isn't particularly mind-blowing to me because there are TOO many possibilities. Maybe Dom is dreaming, maybe he's not. Why is he dreaming? Could it be this? Could it be that? This question is too open-ended to impact me much. It could be anything under the sun, viewers, take your pick!

In the end, the supporting cast saved it for me. The arrival of Ariadne made me sigh with relief, because I thought I'd be stuck with screwed-up Dom and oil-slicked Arthur for two and a half hours. Then I managed to look past Arthur's very bad hair do, and appreciate his very cute facial expressions and awesomeness at rotating-corridor and zero-gravity navigation. I was so happy when he kissed Ariadne! Almost the minute the two of them had screen-time together, I felt the chemistry, something Leo diCap could learn from Joseph Gordon-Levitt. Funny Eames and poor Arthur was another relationship I enjoyed. I also loved Saito, haha, and Yusuf (when he was driving). Basically I loved everyone but Dom and Mal.

Arthur

Ariadne

Eames

Saito

Notice the poster I chose way up there does not have Dom's face in it. (Y)

Summary of why this movie is good but not nice:

1) Morally unsound mind thieves.

2) Selfish, no-team-spirit Dom.

3) Bad acting and poor chemistry by Leo (my opinion)

4) Undermining the negative effects of addiction.

5) The big question too open-ended.

6) Several outstanding goofs.

I shall now sit back and wait for the wrath of the Inception fans to hit me. This scares me, that I'm like the only one of my friends to see it this way. Everyone says it's awesome, except those who don't get it. So, since I am saying it's awesome, but only conditionally, does this mean I don't get it?

Writing

I'm a deep thinker wrapped nice and tight under a frivolous skin - that's how I like to think of it, anyway. A bit like Phillipa Gordon, from Anne of the Island. So you might notice how I tend to shy away from writing on some things when I actually think them. I find writing them too much of a chore - thoughts are like fancies, free, flying things, too beautiful to catch and put down on paper. (More Anne-ish philosophy here.) Well, if you have the skill, that's all right, but I don't, so it's a different story.

But here is my task - I will - I must write down what I think about Inception. 'Twill be a writing exercise for me, something to flex the muscles of this indolent brain over here. I must be like Fire. I will use my brain!

But right now I'm just so lazy.

Ah, and 'cause HuiJan asked me to. Tee hee.

Live Traffic Feed

This is hilarious!

I love this feedjit thingy.

It makes me feel happy because I can see that people are arriving at my blog, even if they might not be reading it.

A pet peeve: When people read my blog and don't comment, or, even worse, when they don't let me know they read at all.

And I learn so much from it! Like, places my knowledge is sadly sketchy on.

Like, I didn't know Santiago, Region Metropolitana is in Chile! A Chilean's been at my blog - I find that very cool. And people from Mexico, someone from Bulgaria, many people from Australia, and various parts of US.

And if you click for further information, I just realised it's just damn-ass funny! They don't let you see previous visitors, just the few recent ones they are willing to display, so this, so far, is all I've got:

Kuala Lumpur, Wilayah Persekutuan arrived from google.com.my on ":: journal of a jacie ::" by searching for how to pronounce chalystha.

Cha was that you?! By the way, you pronounce Chalystha as Ca-liss-tha.

And:

Butterworth, Pulau Pinang arrived from google.com.my on ":: journal of a jacie ::" by searching for Cheong Tzen Ren.

I might post on time to time on what I see from my feedjit. It's just very, very entertaining.

Sorry, no real updates on what I've been doing or how I've been feeling, because I've still not been feeling well.

The Host by Stephenie Meyer - Review

Yesterday Chalystha Lee lent me this book. I started reading it at 5pm thereabouts, and finished it by eleven pm. It's a pretty thick book to finish so fast, plus, it's a psychological thriller, but I just wanted to see how it ended. Like, really, really badly.

This book is something like the Nicole Kidman/Daniel Craig movie The Invasion. In this book, Earth is not the only habitable planet in the universe and humans are not the only - neither are they the most - intelligent species surviving. There are beings called souls, which are parasites in the truest sense, for they can only survive if they live in a host body. They take on that body as if it were their own, and the poor humans just fade away into nothingness once they get their bodies possessed by these souls. Except the very strongest ones. Even though these strong humans lose control of their bodies to the souls, they are still able to retain some sort of consciousness. And that's where the story begins. It's told in the viewpoint of a soul called Wanderer, who is control of Melanie Stryder's body, but can still hear Melanie's voice speaking to her in her head.

*spoiler alerts*

What I like the most in this book is the Wanderer-Melanie relationship. I like how Wanderer (Wanda) begins to respect that Melanie's body is Melanie's, that Melanie's life is Melanie's, that Jared is Melanie's. I like how Melanie understands that Wanda can't help feeling what she feels - I like how Melanie doesn't grudge Wanda for what she is, how she starts seeing things from Wanda's view, the way Wanda sees things through Melanie's. I like how the two of them, in the book, sometimes use the word 'us'. The loyalty between the two of them is something deep.

What else do I like? I like Melanie, a lot. She's my favourite character, actually. I like how Jared is fiercely faithful to Melanie (favourite line: "Melanie will always be mine. And I will always be hers."). And I like the ending, I suppose. No great big humanity-restoring change - because that isn't realistic. It's scary sometimes when you see the route humanity is heading down to.

Now, I liked all of that, but really, you can't get away from the fact that this book was written by Stephenie Meyer.

It was draggy. In too many places. Just like I got the feeling Meyer dragged out Twilight into four very long books for money, I get the feeling she spread The Host out for as long as she possibly could. Sometimes, the image of Jamie in my head, Melanie's younger brother, would get replaced by one of Renesmee. Wanda had too many of Bella's tendencies - being a bad liar, an overwilling martyr, an anti-social loner. Not to mention Meyer likes scenes where the girl tries to seduce the guy and fails. Oh, and who can forget - two guys kissing the same girl, all in the same day?

*end*

What a long review this was. It's what happens when you're having an unofficial holiday all to yourself. :) Didn't go to school today. Had a golden morning with daddy - we went to Dr. Cafe's. I'm sooo addicted to the coffee there la. Going to watch Salt tonight with the fam. Yay!

NCIS

Fox now enables me to watch NCIS all day long.

NCIS has now joined my list of crime-busting series like CSI, Bones, Criminal Minds and others my head is too fuzzy to think of right now.

NCIS stands for Naval Criminal Investigative Service. It's basically crime investigation for the U.S. Navy. I don't watch every episode; I think I like only Season 6 the best. I didn't really like NCIS at first because I found the cast not to my liking. But now I really do love them.

 Anthony "Tony" DiNozzo is hilarious - he's the joker on the far right. He joined NCIS just for the guns and babes - his words, not mine. Abby, the Goth forensics specialist, totally rocks the house down. The little old man standing next to Abby is called Ducky, and next to Ducky is Gibbs, who has a serious personality problem but is the Boss of the team. Ziva is the Israeli agent, and she is awesome. Next to Ziva is McGee, the poor guy who always gets the brunt of Tony's jokes.

The script is just darn good.

Tony is cleaning out his desk.

Ziva: Must you do that now, Tony?

Tony: I have to. It's spring.

Ziva: And?

McGee: You don't have spring cleaning in Israel?

Ziva: We do not have spring. Israel is a desert.

Forgive the quality of this post. I'm feeling as nauseous as a seasick baby.

Sick Season!

Hello dear readers, I'm sick.

I saw this coming on Thursday night, but my premonition was only confirmed when I woke up on Friday morning after a gruesome nightmare to find myself feeling like mallets hammering on the inside of my head, my body was on fire and I was aching like a Zamboni machine.

(Okay, how did I come up with that comparison?! Clearly not feeling well.)

In the end, I struck a deal with evil mom - she'd let me skip the first half of the day, provided I went after recess for double period add maths. And then I collapsed most gratefully back onto my lovely soft bed.

At 10.30, I was left outside the school gate because my dearest daddy was too lazy to bring me into the office and sign me in properly. I had to sneak into school, trying to hold my bright blue bag in the most inconspicuous way possible, scurrying another way when I saw En. Shamsul from the distance. All this with my head screaming protest at me in about a few thousand different voices.

Funniest moment: My sitting in the R&S room, while Joey and Nicole walked by. Joey didn't see me, but Nicole gave me a casual glance and a wave. They walked right past the door, out of sight. Five whole seconds later, they did exactly what people in cartoons do - Nicole realised something was amiss and backtracked with Joey in tow, to check if she was seeing things. As far as they knew, I hadn't come to school!

I was really disappointed that I couldn't play netball in the Karnival Sukan today, as I was supposed to. I was actually looking forward to doing so. What a darned-y nice time to fall sick. I tried waking up this morning, at 7, but my head started spinning and I just went back to sleep. Sigh. At least there's still next year.

I was feeling better - no more fever, no more WWIII going on in my head - but then I started feeling pretty wretched just before leaving for Interact Installation. I was sitting through the whole thing willing myself not to throw up, and left early. But I went anyway - not because my friends forced me to - (hah! do you think they're that scary?) but because I forced myself - how could I miss this major event of theirs?!

And I didn't regret it!

It was a very good event, in my humble opinion. Sure, it had its glitches, but what school event - what Dewan Bakti-held event - doesn't? The video presentation was amusing and pretty impressive, and even though it was an installation, I didn't find it boring at all. The bright golden frames complimented the pillars nicely and the red carpet was taped down nicely.

I just want to say this for the new board - give them a chance. It's not fair to go jumping down people's throats before they've ever had the chance to shine or otherwise. And Nicole Low, keep your head up. No-one who's seen you looking all haggard, doing all you could and more, can ever say you're not capable of living up to your promise. Now you just get proper rest and don't fall sick like me.

Congratulations to all three of you - Low, Lee and Kee.

And Xin You, Han Wey, and Roshan who looked super today.

Sad

And she didn't mind the rain, but it seemed unfair to inflict it upon her guard.

I'm a generally happy person. I'm upbeat; I keep myself that way. No matter what. It's tough sometimes; sometimes I fail; sometimes you see me sad. When you ask me, "Why are you so sad today?" the first thing that runs through my mind is, "I'm sad half the time you see me."

So I'm not going to tell you why I've been sad, what happened, whether it was trivial, whether it was major. The line right at the top is a quote from Fire; and it is very relevant - I'm sad, but why should you - or my blog - be? And, this also brings to mind when we were all supposed to come up with a quote for - English class in F2 methinks?

Mine went this way.

In the darkest of times, look to the least darkest side.

August the First

Yesterday was my momma's birthday.

Not gonna wish her happy birthday here because she doesn't read blogs.

True to family tradition, we spent the whole day eating.

Woke up early as parents were serving in the 6. 30 a.m. mass. I went too - see, teenagers join the elderly zombie community too on their momma's birthdays. Went to Bangsar's Coffee Bean for breakfast.

On a whim we went to Euro Deli in Damansara Kim for lunch. Which is this place specialising in pork. PORK! I LOVE PORK. I LOVE THAT I'M ABLE TO EAT PORK HAHAHA. (Hehe, apologies to my Malay friends.) Anyways, we had like, pork ribs and pork knuckles and pork sausages and all. The place had really good pork. I'm so addicted to pork. Anyway, the only glitch about the place was that on the dining mat there was this caricature of a nice round pig - eating a pork sausage.

Now that's just wrong.

Went to d'italiane kitchen at Jaya 33. The food there is just yum. True quality Italian food. Really. To die for. Italiannies is nothing compared to it. We had pizza and aglio oglio and risotto. And mouth-watering dessert. I'm counting down the days 'til I can somehow eat there again.

Went to Dr. Cafe's (the coffee place my dad and I go off to at least once a week to get our caffeine fix) for coffee after dinner. Caramel macchiato and caffe latte.

I love birthdays.

Oh, and we camwhored a lot. Tee hee. Will post pictures on facebook.