Explanation

Reading XinYou's blog post reminded me I never really blogged about what it was like, properly, receiving my results. Well, I don't think I could blog properly now anyway. My brain has shrunk since considerably these past few weeks.

How to put it? If I described my own feelings, it would be just: nerves. Maybe I wouldn't be freaking out as much as Miss Lee, but... it's hard to describe, after all.

I woke up, refusing to think much about what was coming later, and went out for breakfast with my family. I was literally glued to my phone, smsing XinYou who was to tell me when results were out and calling Chalystha who was shrieking at me several octaves above her normal speaking range.

I ate a lot at OldTown, in defiance, not nerves. Because Cha demanded to know how I could be eating at a moment like this, and I wanted to show my family, who were utterly bored with my nervousness, that I could handle myself with a little bit of... self-control. I slowed down considerably with my last piece of toast, but I told myself to get a grip.

Driving back home from OldTown Cafe, with Cha calling and begging me to go to school with her, I felt the tiniest twinge of regret of having glutted at breakfast. I pushed it away.

I had no idea what time it was, but it was taking too long. Too long. I went into my room to read and not stare at the clock. My sisters were relieved. They were sick of having me fret around them so much.

As I was reading, I realised something that made my heart skip a beat. My phone was not next to me. I ran out of my bedroom at top speed to go and get it when I ran right into my eldest sister, who was holding it out. I stare at the screen (GODDAMNIT, SHE'D ALREADY OPENED IT) and what do I see? A text from Xin You, saying: Hey they're giving results now.. *calm*

Was he asking me to calm down?!

Because if he was, it didn't work. I locked my arms around my sister's neck and climbed onto her back. Literally. My feet were off the floor, and I was clinging to her and all. Moment of pure jakhoon-ness. Luckily I managed to get off her as she began calling for help. I dashed to get decent and my mom, sisters and dog were packed into the car with me feeling slightly... desperate.

I needed to know... thank God school is just 2.5 minutes drive away from my house... My mom kept on asking me stuff along the line of "Where do we go?" and I was ignoring her... somehow I managed to tell her to drive up to Dewan Bakti... where I got her to stop and I flung myself out of the car... and I ran as fast as I could past the puddles and the drain at the side of Dewan Bakti without twisting an ankle - you know how it is - I saw people, and then, I seized... I don't know, one of the jejarum boys, I can't remember, and demanded he tell me which table to go to... and then I skidded over to Pn. Lean, where the first thing she said to me was... "Jacie ahr! Surely straight A's wan la! Sign here..."

I knew she'd say that.

I muttered something for the sake of muttering at her (old habits die hard) squiggled something that was not my signature, and then seized my result slip. I saw nothing but a line of A's.

Relief. Instantaneous relief. Relief so strong it overpowered the joy. Why? Well, surely you know. Pn. Lean's greeting statement sort of explains it.

Everything was light-headed for me, woozy after that. Really. I felt like throwing up. Seriously. I finally regretted eating so much. I wobbled over to my expectant sisters and cha, (Cha's first words being: "I bet you got straight A's, didn't you?"), still staring unseeingly at the paper. Jamie jokingly asked me to count the A's, something I told her I'd do. I tried to, using my finger to do so, and then I realised when Cha pointed it out that I was shaking. Very badly. All the relief in the world couldn't have replaced the great anxiety I'd been feeling.

I'll stop here. It's long enough. It was good to know all my hard work paid off, knowing that, after all I'd studied and slaved and sacrificed, God wasn't going to be so cruel to me. Still, it would have been nice to have felt a little bit more happiness than relief. But that's the price you pay for making sure you get good results - everyone takes your success for granted, and you have to worry double time, in case you really do fail.

Joy

I'm so happy.

I'm so happy now.

I'm so happy that everyone is so happy.

I got straight A's.

It's not unbelievable, but I'm just so happy and relieved.

Exhilarated.

(Ignore the part when I ran into the hall breathless and Pn. Lean said "Aiyah, you surely straight A's one la..")

I was waiting so long. Eating in OldTown... after that I regretted eating so much, I felt like throwing up, before and after I got my results.

But... I'm so happy. My parents got me a fondue pot... my dad say he had so much confidence he and mom but it beforehand, gave it to me when I got home from school.

I love my sisters, my family, my teachers, and friends.

Friends.

JOEY

NICOLE

CHALYSTHA

LI SAR

I love you guys, and I'm proud of you all.

One more thing

Ooh, ooh, ooh.

Since I previously mentioned results in the last post, I can't resist.

Releasing the PMR results on the eve of Christmas Day is no less than blatant prosecution of Christians nationwide.

I'm just saying.

Cousins

I really don't want to post anything much other than about Gilbert but I might as well, since I'll be busy enjoying the last of my freedom, and childhood. (This is a touchy subject with me.) So I'll just... do a short post. Haha. Yes, rejoice, few readers of mine.

We had a partial family gathering the other day, with some of my large, extensive Penang family. The people in this pictures are as follows.

Bottom row: Cousin Vivian, Mark, Sister Jeannie, Cousin Adrian

Middle row: me, Sister Jamie, Cousin Lawrence

Top row: Aunt Ah Ewe, Cousin Derick

Three of these faces will be missing soon. My sister and Mark are taking off on the first of Jan, and Derick kor kor... my big brother in so many ways... the crazy cousin... the one who used to look like the caterpillar in Bug's Life... the one who drank Kickapoo from a soup bowl back in the day... the one who used to let me hang on his arm while he'd lift me off the floor... the one who used to bully me so... will be leaving for Australia, where he can go find Mandy jie jie, his girlfriend. Oh, and to study too. If you knew him, you'd understand why I'd miss him so. Hurh. If I could write out the things he says and the things he does you would pretty much LYAO. Maybe. Maybe I will.

Didn't mean to post this and take attention away from my Gil post, but I'm just writing because I'll be busy later. Sis' birthday, results, Christmas, sister leaving.

Anne movies, and Gilbert Blythe

Everyone should know I've always wanted to be like Anne, just like Anne, ever since I read the books. So my sister and Mark got me an early Christmas present, the 3 Anne movies on DVD: Anne of Green Gables (1985), Anne of Green Gables: The Sequel, and Anne of Green Gables: The Continuing Story. The first was alright. It followed the story line. The second I fast forwarded through a lot, because there was hardly any Gilbert in it, and I didn't really like the storyline, which was loosely based on some of the books, which I didn't much fancy either... The third was ghastly. It was okay, because there was Gilbert there, but... it took so long for them to actually get married even when they were engaged, because... gah, it hurts me to think about it... and when they do get hitched... Gil goes off to war... and Anne follows him... and there's this annoying spy who's in love with her... and I miss Gilbert, who becomes a POW... anyway, I still liked it, even though this time the movie was entirely NOT based on the bok.

Megan Follow's physique for Anne is wrong, but her acting is great. Well, you can't expect every character to look like how you thought they should look, so I was pretty patient while watching the movie with all the characters who didn't fit and all the created story lines.

But I have no complaints about Gilbert Blythe. I love Gil. I want to be Anne so I can marry Gil. I fell in love with Gilbert Blythe the minute my eyes first rested on his name, spelled out on the page of my book. When I was, I don't know, in primary school. What's so surprising? I fell in love with Aragorn on paper too, and Tolkien didn't even give me a proper description of him.

Anyway, dedicating this post to Gilbert now.

This is Gil when he was haha, thirteen?

Poor Gil. So in love with Anne.

And yet always rejected.

Drools..

My poor Gil after being a prisoner-of-war for years.

Ladies and gentlemen, Gilbert Blythe.

A Gil quote, from the book: "...there never could be anyone else for me but you. I've loved you ever since that day you broke your slate over my head in school."

Yes, because sadly Anne smashed a slate, or a miniature blackboard, over Gilbert Blythe's head the first time they met, 14 years before he married her, and broke it.

Then she wouldn't talk to him for five years, and then became friends with him for four years, after which she got scared when he said he loved her, so she left him again for two years, finally realised she belonged with him and got engaged and waited three more years. If you went according to the movie, two days after the wedding he went off to war for another four more years or so.

new moon

I finally did it - I went and got it over with. Not because I wanted to - but because I didn't want to watch Puteri+Katak. And I wanted to watch a movie, to commemorate the outing. So I went and watched new moon with sisters+their bfs. (No, niclow, I did not feel sad and sesat.) It wasn't as annoying as I expected, but boring instead. To be fair, I shall do what Cha did and list out all pros and cons, or I'd just list out the cons.

To be fair...

+ Kristen Stewarts' lips are visible instead of just not there.

+ They taught KS to keep her mouth closed, instead of going around with it open.

+ She did her nightmaring well - and the part when she was running in Italy.

+ The directing, camera stuff and acting were much better than Twilight.

+ Edward's wardrobe improved.

+ Victoria's cool.

+ I had loadsa fun laughing at Jacob's hair before he cut it.

+ I loved Alice having more screen time.

+ Esme looked lovely; so did Carlisle.

+ Jasper had more screen time. I love Jasper.

+ Dakota Fanning as Jane! I wish I could be like Jane.

+ I had fun laughing at the Volturri dude on the left - the one who looked like Lucius Malfoy.

+ They didn't show Rosalie's fat @$$. Hah.

+ Cha is right. Alec is cute; cuter than Edward and Jacob, obviously.

+ Among the 5 of us watching, I was the only one whose chair did not get kicked. Sorry, this doesn't count.

What I really think...

- Rob Pat should keep his shirt on. Seriously. It's almost obscene.

- Bella should have asked Jacob, "Dude, where's your shirt?"

- Sam is fat. Too fat. He looks like a Samadian boy who should keep his shirt on.

- Jacob's wolfy friends are cuter than him.

- Jacob is annoying.

- They killed Harry. I LIKED HIM!

- They should have made Jane dress up cooler.

- Alec sounded superficial instead of hot, and he is hot.

- The part where Bella and Edward were running in the future was... lame beyond description.

- It's too coincidental that Bella would fall into the water right where Victoria was.

- The wolves are fake!

- It was draggy and boring.

- What's with Jake Black standing half naked in the middle of the road?

- They didn't spike Alice's hair enough.

- What did they do to Jasper's hair?!

- I'd love to write more, but my fingers are getting tired.

Overall, this movie helped remove some of my prejudice against Bella and Jacob. Maybe I can finally read the book properly now - I always wanted to, but I was afraid for my health. I think if twilight wasn't loved by millions worldwide, I would love it myself.

Waitress

I watched the first ten minutes of the show in Damai Laut (zomg I haven't blogged about that yet, I'm such a lazy ass) and finished it off today. It stars Keri Russell who reminds me of that pretty Hallmark actress and Nathan Fillion (CASTLE!).

I hated the ending. *spoilers alert* They shouldn't have put Dr. Pomatter as a married guy. Then he could have ended up with her. Zzzz. I tell you ar, these people don't know how to write a decent ending anymore. The main reason why people watch movies like this is to get the happy ending they wouldn't get in real life.

It's pretty funny though. The other waitresses and Cal and Joe were really amusing. But the husband was just... TOOT.

The best line in the movie was this: "Dawn, you look beautiful! Your skin looks like a normal person's!"

P.S. Nathan Fillion is adorable.

2012

Twenty-twelve. That's how it's pronounced, people, you really shouldn't read it out as two-zero-one-two. Anyway, it is one movie which is really really awesome, and not just because I really like it or am biased or whatever, it's because it truly is. The directing was awesome, the story line, the script, the whole idea, and the effects, of course. It was much better than I expected. It was just awesome and funny, and I didn't feel bored even if it were a 3-hour-long movie. But I did feel the length of it though, because I was crying for so long I soon ran out of tears, but because the movie was so long they had time to refill and then dry up again. I mean, I started crying in 2011.

But everyone has to watch this movie. Everyone. Make sure you watch it before 2012, though, because you don't know whether or not you'll still be alive after. =P

Cheers. Will update on my Damai Laut post tomorrow. I just came back today after three days of swimming and beaching, and am so so so black.