Monday, October 26, 2009


I just came back from Penang, and I should be two things: tired, and happy. I am happy, Penang was really great, more on that later, but now I'm just feeling blue. I feel sad, and I just wonder, about things, and - oh, did I mention I've started writing again? It was ages, since I... I've been having writer's block - I'm very disorientated right now, just sad, and I wanna get it all out. Because, I look at all the things I've jotted down when I just feel - like this, and I see it all, and I wonder if one day I'll ever have the courage to - show anyone what I've written, or, if it makes any difference, which I think it does, someone. Because it's just this feeling that feels like - I've never explained it to anyone, and I'm not so tired that I'll explain it here. Because I'm the type of person who'd never do that, ever. So right now in this moment of weakness, this is all I'd let slip, and then, tomorrow I'll be all rise-and-shiny again. Wait for it. But... I'll say this, I'm not okay, even when I say I am, because people rarely say what they really mean.

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